Wedding Song

It is de day of my weddin
an me fadder, im lookin nervous.
An I wonder what it is on im mind.

‘You okay, Papi? You lookin nervous
or sumtin. It’s not Reggie, is it?’

Im smile and im say nah,
dis day is blessed.
Because you an ya man
‘ave my blessins.

And den I tink about
all dem boys who nevah did,
‘ow my daddy brought fya
to dem yard.

And I is curious.
And I ask him.
You remembah all dem boys -
dem coulda beens -
who you chased away?

An im cut from his nerves
an im smile at me, an say
“Girl, I remembah....”

*****

De first guy mi Sunshine evah
brought back to me,
I took im to de garden,
an I said, “Dis is me garden.
Nice, innit?
I consider it my place
to keep the weeds
in check.

Weeds ave dere place in de gran scheme
but I got me one special sunflower
to protec.

Tell me, me boy,
what sort of plant are you?
An I give im one o dem
thoughtful stares.

Im nevah come back

after dat.

An you told me,
“Daddy, why you ave to
make im scare!?
Im run away
an im nevah come back!”

Good, I thought, back den.
“Im not overstan’ im minerals;
im run away from himself -
not from me, or you.”
No sweat.

*****

De secon’ man she evah brought back,
im was older. 

I pour us a drink
and I ask im 
while we was sippin dat good
dark rum with ice,
“What are your intentions
with my daughtah.”

Im give me dat usual talk.
Im no say dat 
me daughta can 
speak fe ‘erself
Im say nuttin 
remotely real.

So I nodded an I sipped and den
I look at im very deeply,
fixin im in my stare,
an I say, coolly,

“And what are your intentions
with my daughtah?”

Im wriggle in im seat
like a liccle worm
on a hook

an I kissed me teeth.
I thought, run, boy,
or come back
when you is man enough
to speak your truth
and you knowin
what you is sayin.

An you said,
“Daddy, he was not playin!
I thought he was de one!”

Ah, really? I thought.
Is that why he run?

*****

I look at my Papi
and I take his hand.
“Papi, why you always used to
scare my men away?
An what about Reggie?”

He looks me in the eye
an he begins to speak.

“I was not doin it fe myself;
I was doin dem tings for you,
all of it.

Because it is my job
to look out for you.
I didn’t want you meetin some man
who was like I was
at dat age, back den.

I know I ave to let you fly free.
I nevah want to hold onto you
cause I is scare.

You gonna fly.
And if you gonna fly,
you gonna fly
togeddah -
forever.

An you an you man gone ave
the blessin of de sun,
and de moon, and de stars,
and de sky, and from
de very bottom of my soul,
my salts.

You found im now.
I can see im love you.

You go fly, my pretty sweet darlin.
Thru time an space an love.
An you show your liccle birds
how to touch de sky.”